Jacobism 6.0

Happy Tuesday Friends! I enjoyed my long weekend thanks to MLK Jr. Day! I got lots of housework caught up (BORING) and I finished up some supplies for Lane’s 2^nd Birthday Party! We are so excited to see that sweet boy this week! I wanted to share a Jacobism! What?! A Jacobism? Yes, it has been far too long since I shared one of Jacob’s insightful nuggets, but I experienced one firsthand the other night.

I don’t think I have ever shared which side of Jacob is my favorite. You see, Jacob has many sides. There is serious Jacob, silly Jacob, professional Jacob, nerd Jacob (this includes dungeons and dragons Jacob) talkative Jacob (which is most of the time, he loves his own voice J ) and my favorite delirious Jacob. Delirious Jacob occurs when Jacob is either sleep deprived or under the influence of ½ a Benadryl (lightweight) or cold medicine. I am usually the only one who gets to experience delirious Jacob, but there have been a few times where Amber & Johanna got to see him as well. When Jacob is disturbed while he is “sleeping”, I don’t think it is actual sleeping because he seems a bit coherent, but he is definitely not awake, he wakes in a RAGE. A funny rage, but a rage nonetheless.

Lilo is completely Jacob's cat. Don't let these sweet pictures fool you, this cat is EVIL.

For instance, we have a cat Lilo, who is the spawn of Satan. He is really trying to murder me. Lilo, although extremely overweight, likes to “act a fool” in the middle of the night. He doesn’t do this all the time, but every once in a while he will get a wild hair and get into some catnip at 2 AM. During his rampages he will be playing with anything from a potato to ping pong balls (which we have hidden all over our house thanks to Lane). Most of the time I can snap my fingers or pretend to throw a pillow at him and he will decide that I mean business; however, there are those few instances that despite my repeated attempts, he continues making a ruckus. This is when delirious Jacob makes an appearance. He sits straight up in the bed and shouts, “WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?” this is directed to me, not the cat trying to wake the neighborhood. I then calmly tell him that his precious Lilo will not stop batting the ping pong ball under the bed and he is making it almost impossible to sleep.  He then proceeds to shout once again, “LILO, YOU STUPID CAT!” This usually scares Lilo and he decides that he should stop doing whatever it is and go to sleep as well. Jacob then lies back down and goes to sleep like nothing happened. He mostly has no memory of the events from the night before.

Jacob is not always angry when he is awoken, just mostly. There is the rare occurrence when he just says ridiculous things and I try hard to remember them when I wake up the next morning. Luckily for me/him, I remembered one from the other night. Jacob had gone to sleep and had been still/quiet for about 30 minutes. I was reading my book and decided that it was time to hit the hay. After I plugged in my Ipad this is the conversation that went down:

Jacob: “Come bear snuggle”

Lenzie: “Bear Snuggle?”

Jacob: “BEAR SNUGGLE”

**I’m afraid at this point that angry delirious Jacob will make an appearance so I try to be nice and calm.**

Lenzie: “You want me to be the big spoon?”

**Not knowing what a bear snuggle is, sounds frightening actually, I scooted over to be the big spoon and draped my leg over him as to be closer to a bear than a spoon.**

Jacob: “Why is your leg over me, we aren’t falling off a cliff”

Lenzie: “Well, I wasn’t sure what a bear snuggle was so I guessed”

**Jacob shoves my leg off of him and then falls back/to sleep.**

These delightful tidbits happen every so often and I LOVE asking about them in the morning. That next morning I asked him if he remembered any of this conversation, he of course, did not. I was thinking that maybe he had watched the animal planet or some nature show before falling asleep, but I discovered he was watching lock up. I’m assuming I was protecting him from other prisoners that were trying to “bear snuggle” with him in his dream. From what I can deduce, Jacob would not do well in prison.

I want to wish my precious Laners a Happy 2^nd Birthday! I hope you all have a fabulous week! 

I Think I'm Adopted. . .

Hi friends! I hope you’re having a fabulous week so far. I wanted to let you all know that I did make my 1 day of running last week. I felt like I could have died, but I didn’t! I am starting my BarreAmped classes again today, hopefully it will be just what I need to jump start me into healthiness! I was really good last week and this week so far by not eating so much CRAP! My weekend, however, was not so successful, but I jumped back on the wagon. I feel like I need Jillian Michaels to follow me around for 1 week. That lady terrifies me, but I want her body so bad! Actually I’ve decided I want Taylor Schilling’s body. I’m obsessed with her! See how perfect she is. . .  But, I digress, on to the actual post.

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1657451520/nm2279940

I wanted to share a short story from our holidays that may explain why I think I’m adopted. My Mother, bless her heart, was not blessed with cooking skills. She has ZERO interest in cooking what so ever. In fact, when building our house 20 years ago she asked my Dad to put in a drive thru window instead of a kitchen. . . She can craft and sew and wood work and garden and just about anything else, but not cook. I LOVE to cook! I think I started watching Food Network when I was in 7^th grade. I have been cooking and baking since that time. Well, maybe even before that time as I fixed by lunch every day since second grade. I don’t know if I’d call a fruit by the foot, cheetos, peanut butter or mayonnaise and pretzel sandwich and a pop a balanced lunch, but I was a kid with LOTS of metabolism.

You see, since my sisters and I were old enough to really cook, we were put in charge of cooking/baking anything that would go to a family function, bake sale, holiday gathering, ect… This New Years I was reminded of why we usually do the cooking. We scheduled our annual Christmas party at my parent’s house on the Saturday before New Years. We don’t get together with our extended family very often, so we try to at least schedule one get together per year as we are all busy and it is difficult to get everyone in at the same time. I had a rough working menu in mind, but the weather made it a bit difficult to have a crab/shrimp boil so we went with the ol’ Christmas standby-Ham. I had the ham thawed and planned on baking it at my parent’s house as we would be there all day. Once Jake & I arrived we noticed that there was a ham in the oven! We were shocked! I did not communicate with my mother that I would bring over the ham and cook it at her house, I just assumed she knew. Could my mother have put a ham in the oven for us? Did she decide that this would be the year to make a big contribution to the dinner? Has she finally gotten over her aversion to cooking?! These questions raced through my mind!   

Once we unloaded the car, I took a closer look at the ham in the oven. The oven was set to 350°. The ham looked dry and possibly completely cooked. I then called my mother to inquire how long she had been baking the ham. That is when I lost it. She tells me that the ham had been in the oven for a couple of hours now, but she assured me that the ham couldn’t be done yet as she was de-frosting it. De-frosting it?, I asked. The ham was frozen and after 5 minutes in the microwave she decided to just put it in the oven on 350° until it was completely cooked. Please note that she had added NO liquid to the roasting pan. This ham looked like ham jerky on the top and it was still frozen in the middle. I immediately took her ham out of the oven and started baking mine. Once my ham was cooked, I lowered the oven temperature, added liquid to the roasting pan and cooked/salvaged the ham until it was completely cooked. Jacob and I were laughing so hard we were crying the entire time! Thank goodness for my Dad’s Mother (who was seriously the best cook I have ever met and she thankfully instilled her love of cooking into my heart!) and the Food Network or we might have all had a bad case of food poisoning. I guess that is one way to start a New Year’s diet. . .

If you take anything from this post, please remember that you should never bake a frozen ham or put it in the microwave to defrost. . . PS. I don’t think that I am actually adopted even though my mother and I are complete opposites! Bless her heart, we love her! She provides us with endless amounts of entertainment. Haha! I hope you all have a fabulous week!

A New Year, A New Me!

Hello my fabulous readers! I hope you all had a great Christmas & a wonderful New Year! I got to see my entire family on New Year’s, so it was perfect! I wanted to share a bit about what was happening in our lives lately as I know my blogging has taken a serious downhill plunge. It just seems like it is harder and harder to sit and write. As I mentioned earlier that my family came down for New Year’s so I got to see my nephew Lane. Precious Laners is such a little man now! It is crazy to see how fast he grows! It just seems like yesterday he was babbling nonsense and now he is asking for things in sentences and saying, “I love you LenLen.” It is soo cute! I love him so much! He will be TWO this month?!? Two, can you believe that? We are busy planning his Train Themed birthday party. I hope he loves it! I have some other exciting news! I am going to have another nephew in June! Yay!! Lane is going to be a big brother! We are beyond exited and cannot wait to meet baby boy. He doesn't have a name yet. I, of course, suggested Carlos, but it was denied…

Have you made/broken any New Year’s resolutions? Mine are technically starting today as I was sick last week and who wants to stick to resolutions when you don’t feel well?! Not me, that is for sure! I am hoping that by “publishing” my resolutions that I will STICK to them and just maybe it will help you all stick to yours as well.

Resolution 1: Run a 5k! This is where most of my readers roll their eyes. I have been saying that I would run a 5K for YEARS. I have participated in a few, but I have never run one all the way through. This is the year that I WILL do this. I know it will be hard, I feel like after jogging for only 2 minutes that my lungs are going to explode and I am having a heart attack. I got a pair of Brooks running shoes for Christmas and I am anxious to test them out. Tonight is my first run. If I don’t blog again you’ll know that I legitimately died from over exertion. Keep your fingers crossed friends.

Resolution 2: Lose weight! This isn’t as much of a number thing as it is a look thing. I am about 10 lbs up from my lightest weight and I have seriously let myself slide this last couple of months. I want to get back in the habit of eating healthy and working out. No more fried foods (except okra only sparingly, because it is delicious), no sugary drinks (I’ve cut them out already for 2 years now, but I’m sticking with it), less carbs, more veggies, less dessert and more water. Resolution 1 will help, but I am going to continue attending Barre class and eating healthy. Hungry Girl & I are about to become best friends once again. For those who don’t know what BarreAmped classes are you should really check them out. You use a bar, ballet, not stripper, and you do strength training, yoga and aerobics. I will be taking the boot camp in order to get my butt in shape!

Resolution 3: Blog More! Like I mentioned above, my blogging has almost diminished. It just seems like I have been busy with work, party planning, Pinterest and life that blogging just falls through the cracks. I have no weddings this year to plan; thankfully, I am still recuperating from Johanna’s! Haha, Love you Johanna! It is not like I have anything profound to say, but if you take away at least 1 thing from my blog it would be a success. It could be a new product that you’ve never heard of or a vacation spot or even a tip on how not to act on Facebook! Haha

Resolution 4: TRAVEL! 2012 was a great year for travel for Jacob & I. We visited Dallas, St. Louis, Louisville, New York, Effingham, IL (I only added because it is so fun to say Effingham), Denver, Vegas and Atlantis Bahamas. I know that my biological clock (AKA Jacob) is only going to allow a couple more years (if even that) before our deal (contract) is up for me holding off on kids. I have a BIG list of places that I HAVE to see before we have a kid(s). Here are the places that I would live to visit in 2013/2014:

·        Harry Potter world- Girl’s Trip! Jacob is invited, but I need someone to go who appreciates Harry Potter! I don’t think he will get excited about trying butter beer or having a wand picked out for you at Ollivander’s or dressing in our house colors. . .

Hawaii

·        Hawaii- I’ve been to these beautiful islands one time and I have been dying to go back ever since. What a magical place to share with Jacob. It is absolutely breathtakingly beautiful!  

·        The Southern US Coast line- Georgia, South Carolina & North Carolina- I just hear Nicholas Sparks calling my name to visit these places. I’m pretty sure we should rent a convertible and drive the coast.

·        Mexico- If you remember from my post a few months back, Jake & I got food poisoning before we left to go to Mexico so we had to cancel our trip. We really want to go back to the Excellence Resort in Playa Mujures. They were so helpful and understanding when we had to cancel and we have heard GREAT things about the resort!

·        Bahamas- When they say that the water in the Bahamas is the most beautiful water in the world, I believe it. Just flying over you can see every color of blue imaginable. We loved Atlantis and not fighting any crowds was the icing on the cake. We want to go back to this paradise!

·        New York- My favorite city! I want to make this into a yearly trip! The FALL was a perfect time to visit. I do want to see it during Christmas too, but the cold weather is throwing me off a bit. I like my 60 degree Oklahoma weather in December!

·        Washington D.C- Everyone should view the capitol at some point. Plus the Smithsonian institute will be AMAZING! The monuments and white house would be so fun to see. I’m not a big history fan, but this is something you cannot pass on seeing.

I’m sure Jake has his own list of places to see this year, but wherever we go it will be fun (unless it is Denver again, Denver was awful J)

I’m sure I will think of more resolutions and I will post them as they come to me. The biggest thing is remembering that I will not get there tomorrow. I am so impatient and these goals take time. Wish me luck friends! I’ll be back soon! Have a great week!